Celebrate Hot Chocolate Day
Jan 31
This is one of the greatest drinks of all time. Nobody deserves its powerful flavor. We should be grateful that we can eat butt. Someone is letting you put your face between their cheeks, and we don't care. Unbelievable.
Celebrate Croissant Day
Jan 30
Looking for a sugary breakfast treat that will also make you horny? Well look no further because the Croissant is your angel from heaven. It will load you up with a sugar high before you answer your emails, plus make you rock hard.
Celebrate Corn Chip Day
Jan 29
Corn chips will snap you back to reality, letting gravity take a hike. Forget about mom's spaghetti, or her breast milk, or the dry tree bark she used to feed you. It's corn chip time. So grab some queso, and let's get after it.
Celebrate Blueberry Pancake Day
Jan 28
This sweet dessert treat gives women the power to wear loud leggings and teach other ladies how to do workout dances. The Latin flavor makes it extra spicy, which means we need blueberry pancakes to see us through.
Celebrate Chocolate Cake Day
Jan 27
Arguably the greatest dessert of all time, chocolate cake has helped so many people get through tough times. If your spouse just passed away or you don't find joy on social media, chocolate cake can rescue you from those depths.
